Release Blitz for F**k, Marry, Kill Me, Daddy by Lance Lansdale

 

Release Blitz, Excerpt & Giveaway:
F**k, Marry, Kill Me, Daddy
By Lance Lansdale

Murder Daddy, Book 1

SCOTTY
My boyfriend’s been trying to kill me for weeks. Well, I guess he's my boyfriend. I mean, we've never officially been introduced, but he's always standing in the shadows, watching me. That has to be a good sign, right? The first time I saw him, he was hunched down in my bushes, aiming a rifle at my heart, and he's turned up with a new weapon every night since. As fun as our silly little game of Murder Daddy may be, I’m getting tired of having to steal my stalker-slash-boyfriend’s affection by disarming him and using his weapons against him.

BRODY
I’ve got to get my head in the game. As my agency’s top assassin, I’ve killed my fair share of men. When Senator Levinson placed his son on my hitlist, I figured it would be a one-and-done. I was wrong. Every time our paths cross, he winds up getting the upper hand. The things he makes me do once he’s pried a gun or a knife out of my hand are downright depraved, and for some reason, I can't bring myself to stop it from happening. My wife tells me I need to just suck it up and get the job done. My wife’s boyfriend says I’m sweet on the guy, which is absolutely ridiculous. Even if I wanted to take advantage of our open marriage, I’m not gay. This man—this Freakshow—is completely unhinged, and the worst part is, I think I might be just as crazy as him.

F**ck, Marry, Kill Me, Daddy is a high-heat, over-the-top, absolutely UNHINGED, dual-POV, dark romcom that is equal parts insta-love and insta-lust. While one character is married, their marriage is open, and there's no cheating between them.

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Excerpt:

No matter where I go, he’s there. Waiting. Observing. Others might call it stalking. I just think he’s being adorable.

I’m not exactly sure when he started following me, but the first time I noticed him was three weeks ago. I was sitting on my apartment’s balcony, wanting a bit of fresh air after a week of self-imposed seclusion. I couldn’t have been out there longer than five minutes before the red dot appeared in the center of my chest. When I looked down over the railing, the apartment complex’s floodlight lit him up just for me. He was hiding in the bushes, pointing a rifle at me. Our eyes locked, and we just stood there for a solid five minutes, neither of us making a move. It had been such a long time since anyone had looked at me like that. It was like a million little shockwaves coursing through my body.

My impending death aside, there had been a gentleness in the moment. A connection of sorts. I must have frightened him when I waved, because he stumbled, falling on his back and sending a bullet into the sky. I’m not sure why he ran off into the dead of night, but it gave me a delightful view of his ass. The thought of topping had never even crossed my mind, what with my small stature and constant desire to be coddled, but I don’t know. I might make an exception for this guy.

The next time I spotted him, he was hiding under my car with wire cutters, fast at work. I thought he was trying to be a good Samaritan by changing my oil. Being a twinkish procrastinator, I know nothing of cars, and it had been over three years since I’d taken it to the mechanic. I mean, it’s not that big of a deal. I just pour a little oil into the hole thingy, under the hood when it starts making rattling noises, and it’s good as gold. Still, it was nice to have someone looking out for me. It’s been a long time since anyone has. For his chivalry, I figured the least I could do was kiss his hand like a distressed damsel to his knight. I knelt down to thank him, but he startled, dropping the wire cutters. When I picked them up and tried to hand them back, his beautiful brown eyes practically bulged out of his head, and he scurried away like a cheeky scamp.

I’m pretty sure he’s obsessed with me, but I think I’ve high-key wanted that all my life.

This book is absolutely hilariously entertaining. Scotty and Brody’s love story is a love story like no other, full of chaotic happenings. 

Brody, the assassin is hired to assassinate Scotty but through complete miscommunication, nothing works as it should.

 Scotty is completely delusional about what is happening all he sees are stars in his when he sees Brody! 

Great side characters, wonderfully written, its over the top but I couldn't stop reading.

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Enter the Giveaway:

To celebrate the release of F**k, Marry, Kill Me, Daddy, Lance is giving away a paperback and an eBook of the release!

Enter the Rafflecopter giveaway for your chance to win!

A Rafflecopter Giveaway

Direct Link: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/cc0f2a57886/?

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About the Author:

Lance Lansdale is the author of We Burn Beautiful and The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss. He writes swoony romance with an excessive amount of cuddle scenes.

Connect with Lance:
lancelansdale.com
instagram.com/lancetastik
Facebook: Lance Lansdale

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Blog Tour for The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss by Lance Lansdale

 

Blog Tour, Excerpt & Giveaway:
The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss
By Lance Lansdale

Th​​​ere is a home in New Orleans where—for a price—even the unlovable can find a love story for the ages. Ms. Broussard's Home for Bountiful Beaus offers custom-made automatons, fully versed in the art of homemaking.

Arthur Price is not looking for love. The lonely librarian clings to work and routine to keep himself functioning. When his brother, Jared, arrives in the middle of the night with an i-Series automaton meant to lift his spirits, he realizes his routine life is about to be upended. Cheerful to a fault, Periwinkle is not someone Arthur would normally choose to befriend, much less enter into a romantic entanglement with, but he somehow programs himself perfectly into his life.

Miraculously, Arthur finds himself growing almost… fond of the robot.

Periwinkle may not possess much experience outside cleaning, but he can’t help noticing the loneliness in his librarian’s eyes. If it means giving Arthur Price a fresh start, Periwinkle is more than happy to stitch together all of Arthur’s broken pieces.​​

The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss is a cozy, dual POV, slow-burn romance about a lonely librarian and his made-to-order boyfriend.

Universal Link

Add on Goodreads

---

Excerpt:

Periwinkle couldn’t speak. He couldn’t do much else than stare into Arthur’s eyes. Did Arthur even have to ask? Of course, he’d missed him. Arthur was his home. Periwinkle knew he needed to answer, but it was like someone had shut off his voice function. Like they’d cracked his skull wide open and taken out his courage, piece-by-piece.

So, when Periwinkle couldn’t speak, he did the only thing he could think to of. He brought his index finger to his lip and pressed a kiss to the tip. When he was done, he held it against Arthur’s lips. And if a tear trickled down his cheek when Arthur kissed it back, that would just have to be their little secret.

Periwinkle spent the rest of the night watching Arthur rest. He couldn’t deny how nice Arthur’s arm felt wrapped around him. He wondered if it would be like this going forward. Would Arthur always share a bed with him? If he did, would Arthur expect the things Periwinkle saw in his magazine.

Heat sizzled across his face. It was far too early in the morning for Periwinkle to worry about the men in the magazine.

Far too early, indeed.

5 plus stars!

The book "The Househusband's Guide To Domestic Bliss" is an exceptional read that I recently came across. 

 Authored by Lance Lansdale, this book kept me hooked to its pages, and I couldn't stop reading until I reached the end. The story revolves around the lives of two central characters, Peri and Authur.

 When Peri first meets Authur, his expectations are not met, but as time passes, a connection starts to develop between them, and it was a privilege to witness it grow. The story is set in a community where Peri becomes a part of a Ladies Auxiliary group, and the characters he meets, including Mrs Peppercorn, are all wonderfully depicted. 

 The way the story is written is truly unique, and the author has done an exceptional job of bringing everything together. 

 The book is not just a simple read; it's an experience that takes you on an emotional journey. I would give this book more than 5 stars if I could, as it is perfect in every way and written beautifully.

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Enter the Giveaway:

To celebrate the release of The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss, Lance is giving away a paperback and an eBook of the release!

Enter the Rafflecopter giveaway for your chance to win!

A Rafflecopter Giveaway

Direct Link: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/cc0f2a57843/?

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About the Author:

Like Kent Fox, I'm a thirty-something gay man with a flair for the dramatic and a passion for gay romance and LGBTQ+ fiction. I write stories focusing on queer joy and families found along the way. My debut novel, We Burn Beautiful was released last year.

Connect with Lance:
lancelansdale.com
instagram.com/lancetastik
Facebook: Lance Lansdale

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Release Blitz for The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss by Lance Lansdale

 

Release Blitz, Excerpt & Giveaway:
The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss
By Lance Lansdale

Th​​​ere is a home in New Orleans where—for a price—even the unlovable can find a love story for the ages. Ms. Broussard's Home for Bountiful Beaus offers custom-made automatons, fully versed in the art of homemaking.

Arthur Price is not looking for love. The lonely librarian clings to work and routine to keep himself functioning. When his brother, Jared, arrives in the middle of the night with an i-Series automaton meant to lift his spirits, he realizes his routine life is about to be upended. Cheerful to a fault, Periwinkle is not someone Arthur would normally choose to befriend, much less enter into a romantic entanglement with, but he somehow programs himself perfectly into his life.

Miraculously, Arthur finds himself growing almost… fond of the robot.

Periwinkle may not possess much experience outside cleaning, but he can’t help noticing the loneliness in his librarian’s eyes. If it means giving Arthur Price a fresh start, Periwinkle is more than happy to stitch together all of Arthur’s broken pieces.​​

The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss is a cozy, dual POV, slow-burn romance about a lonely librarian and his made-to-order boyfriend.

Universal Link

Add on Goodreads

---

Excerpt:

Periwinkle couldn’t speak. He couldn’t do much else than stare into Arthur’s eyes. Did Arthur even have to ask? Of course, he’d missed him. Arthur was his home. Periwinkle knew he needed to answer, but it was like someone had shut off his voice function. Like they’d cracked his skull wide open and taken out his courage, piece-by-piece.

So, when Periwinkle couldn’t speak, he did the only thing he could think to of. He brought his index finger to his lip and pressed a kiss to the tip. When he was done, he held it against Arthur’s lips. And if a tear trickled down his cheek when Arthur kissed it back, that would just have to be their little secret.

Periwinkle spent the rest of the night watching Arthur rest. He couldn’t deny how nice Arthur’s arm felt wrapped around him. He wondered if it would be like this going forward. Would Arthur always share a bed with him? If he did, would Arthur expect the things Periwinkle saw in his magazine.

 Heat sizzled across his face. It was far too early in the morning for Periwinkle to worry about the men in the magazine.

Far too early, indeed.

---

Enter the Giveaway:

To celebrate the release of The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss, Lance is giving away a paperback and an eBook of the release!

Enter the Rafflecopter giveaway for your chance to win!

A Rafflecopter Giveaway

Direct Link: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/cc0f2a57843/?

---

About the Author:

Like Kent Fox, I'm a thirty-something gay man with a flair for the dramatic and a passion for gay romance and LGBTQ+ fiction. I write stories focusing on queer joy and families found along the way. My debut novel, We Burn Beautiful was released last year.

Connect with Lance:
lancelansdale.com
instagram.com/lancetastik
Facebook: Lance Lansdale

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Cover Reveal for The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss by Lance Lansdale

 

Cover Reveal & Giveaway:
The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss
By Lance Lansdale

Coming April 3rd

Th​​​ere is a home in New Orleans where—for a price—even the unlovable can find a love story for the ages. Ms. Broussard's Home for Bountiful Beaus offers custom-made automatons, fully versed in the art of homemaking.

Arthur Price is not looking for love. The lonely librarian clings to work and routine to keep himself functioning. When his brother, Jared, arrives in the middle of the night with an i-Series automaton meant to lift his spirits, he realizes his routine life is about to be upended. Cheerful to a fault, Periwinkle is not someone Arthur would normally choose to befriend, much less enter into a romantic entanglement with, but he somehow programs himself perfectly into his life.

Miraculously, Arthur finds himself growing almost… fond of the robot.

Periwinkle may not possess much experience outside cleaning, but he can’t help noticing the loneliness in his librarian’s eyes. If it means giving Arthur Price a fresh start, Periwinkle is more than happy to stitch together all of Arthur’s broken pieces.​​

The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss is a cozy, dual POV, slow-burn romance about a lonely librarian and his made-to-order boyfriend.

Pre-Order Universal Link

Add on Goodreads

---

Enter the Giveaway:

To celebrate the cover reveal of The Househusband's Guide to Domestic Bliss, we are giving away 2 advanced e-copies of the upcoming release!

Enter the Rafflecopter giveaway for your chance to win!

A Rafflecopter Giveaway

Direct Link: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/cc0f2a57822/?

---

About the Author:

Like Kent Fox, I'm a thirty-something gay man with a flair for the dramatic and a passion for gay romance and LGBTQ+ fiction. I write stories focusing on queer joy and families found along the way. My debut novel, We Burn Beautiful was released last year.

Connect with Lance:
lancelansdale.com
instagram.com/lancetastik
Facebook: Lance Lansdale

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Blog Tour for We Burn Beautiful by Lance Lansdale

 

Release Blitz, Excerpt & Giveaway:
We Burn Beautiful
By Lance Lansdale

We went into this knowing we'd get burned. And God, we burned so beautifully.

Kent Fox is not okay. Thanks to a botched selfie swap, thousands of his colleagues have borne witness to a photo of his sock-covered crotch. Branded a professional pariah, he's had to move home with his mother, and the only job the 38-year-old former executive can land is stocking shelves at a grocery store. To make matters worse, his new boss is none other than his ex-gay ex-boyfriend.

To everyone else, Gray Collins is the perfect Christian. He manages the local Pick-n-Save, attends West Clark Apostolic Church four times a week, and he's just bought a ring for the woman who has agreed to help him hide his homosexuality. To Kent, however, Gray is the same coward he was twenty years ago. The boy with a list of seventeen reasons why he deserved Kent’s heart. The man who did nothing as his brother ripped Kent from his arms and out of his life for two decades.

Forced together, Kent and Gray will have to confront the trauma that tore them apart, and all the old feelings that never truly died. Kent may not have a list of seventeen reasons for Gray, but he has three words that are just as true as they've ever been.

We Burn Beautiful is a single-POV, second chance slow burn romance about two childhood boyfriends who never had the chance to shine. There's pining, there's passion, and there's a group of 80-year-old Apostolic debutantes ready to help Kent Fox find his forever.

Universal Link

Add on Goodreads

---

Excerpt:

Gray was standing less than two feet away from me, his face white as a ghost. A ghost with far too much gel in his hair. A ghost with unnecessarily long lashes and big brown puddles for eyes that I absolutely did not want to go swimming in. A wraith from the pre-Atlanta period of my life with a peppering of freckles that I most certainly didn’t want to play connect the dots with, using only my tongue.

“Hi,” I said. It was the only word I could find in my drunken state. He just stood there, staring at me with a vacant look on his face. “I’m on vacation,” I blurted out, wiping drunken tears from my cheeks. “A week-long vacation. I just stopped by to see my mom.” I hiccupped. “I have a job. A good job.”

“I think he heard you say you were homeless and living with your mother,” Jeff pointed out, though no one had asked for his input.

“Yes, I realize that,” I said to Jeff, my eyes locked on Gray. “Thank you very much for the update, Jeff, you goddamn sociopath.”

Gray winced when I took the Lord’s name in vain. Just as pious as ever. I tilted my head to the side, staring at him. Twenty years, and there was still an anger deep inside of me that refused to go unheard, so I channeled that rage into insults that made no sense whatsoever.

“Your skin looks terrible,” I said, even though it didn’t. “Have you picked up an unsightly meth addiction?” I asked, even though he looked to be in perfect health. I furrowed my brow so that he would know that I meant it as an insult—but honestly, is there any way to tell someone they look like they smoke crystal meth and not mean it as an insult? He looked to be in peak physical condition, but that didn’t stop me from pointing at his flat stomach and smirking. “You’ve gotten fat.”

“Kent,” Kate whispered into my ear. “Kent, I think we should get you home.”

“I don’t need to go home. Gray and I are catching up.”

“Trust me, you’re embarrassing yourself. Let’s get you home.”

“Do you know what’s really embarrassing?”

“This. Right now. This is,” she hissed into my ear.

“Watching me get kicked out of my house and not even having the decency to say goodbye. Letting him take me that night and not doing a goddamn thing when I begged for help. That’s embarrassing.”

Kate dragged me away from the bar as Gray stared at me with bulging eyes.

“Bye,” I shouted, not caring that every eye in the bar was on me and my salsa-coated crotch. Breaking free from the grip Kate had on my wrist, I pointed at my waving hand. “Bye! Bye, Gray! That’s what normal people say when their best friend gets kicked out with sixty dollars to their name, you fucking coward.”

We Burn Beautiful is Lance Lansdale's debut book, it's an amazing story. 

A wonderful story of returning home and finding your complete self, well trying to.

 Kent and Gray have a history that is meant to be read! A complete slow burn romance that is written well plus is very humorous.

 I laughed and I held my breath in parts.

 The writing is solid and kept me glued till the last page.

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Enter the Giveaway:

To celebrate the release of We Burn Beautiful, Lance is giving away a Signed Paperback copy and an e-copy of this beautiful debut!

Enter the Rafflecopter giveaway for your chance to win!

A Rafflecopter Giveaway

Direct Link: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/cc0f2a57800/?

---

About the Author:

Like Kent Fox, I'm a thirty-something gay man with a flair for the dramatic and a passion for gay romance and LGBTQ+ fiction. I write stories focusing on queer joy and families found along the way.

Connect with Lance:
lancelansdale.com
instagram.com/lancetastik

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Release Blitz for We Burn Beautiful by Lance Lansdale

 

Release Blitz, Excerpt & Giveaway:
We Burn Beautiful
By Lance Lansdale

We went into this knowing we'd get burned. And God, we burned so beautifully.

Kent Fox is not okay. Thanks to a botched selfie swap, thousands of his colleagues have borne witness to a photo of his sock-covered crotch. Branded a professional pariah, he's had to move home with his mother, and the only job the 38-year-old former executive can land is stocking shelves at a grocery store. To make matters worse, his new boss is none other than his ex-gay ex-boyfriend.

To everyone else, Gray Collins is the perfect Christian. He manages the local Pick-n-Save, attends West Clark Apostolic Church four times a week, and he's just bought a ring for the woman who has agreed to help him hide his homosexuality. To Kent, however, Gray is the same coward he was twenty years ago. The boy with a list of seventeen reasons why he deserved Kent’s heart. The man who did nothing as his brother ripped Kent from his arms and out of his life for two decades.

Forced together, Kent and Gray will have to confront the trauma that tore them apart, and all the old feelings that never truly died. Kent may not have a list of seventeen reasons for Gray, but he has three words that are just as true as they've ever been.

We Burn Beautiful is a single-POV, second chance slow burn romance about two childhood boyfriends who never had the chance to shine. There's pining, there's passion, and there's a group of 80-year-old Apostolic debutantes ready to help Kent Fox find his forever.

Universal Link

Add on Goodreads

---

Excerpt:

Gray was standing less than two feet away from me, his face white as a ghost. A ghost with far too much gel in his hair. A ghost with unnecessarily long lashes and big brown puddles for eyes that I absolutely did not want to go swimming in. A wraith from the pre-Atlanta period of my life with a peppering of freckles that I most certainly didn’t want to play connect the dots with, using only my tongue.

“Hi,” I said. It was the only word I could find in my drunken state. He just stood there, staring at me with a vacant look on his face. “I’m on vacation,” I blurted out, wiping drunken tears from my cheeks. “A week-long vacation. I just stopped by to see my mom.” I hiccupped. “I have a job. A good job.”

“I think he heard you say you were homeless and living with your mother,” Jeff pointed out, though no one had asked for his input.

“Yes, I realize that,” I said to Jeff, my eyes locked on Gray. “Thank you very much for the update, Jeff, you goddamn sociopath.”

Gray winced when I took the Lord’s name in vain. Just as pious as ever. I tilted my head to the side, staring at him. Twenty years, and there was still an anger deep inside of me that refused to go unheard, so I channeled that rage into insults that made no sense whatsoever.

“Your skin looks terrible,” I said, even though it didn’t. “Have you picked up an unsightly meth addiction?” I asked, even though he looked to be in perfect health. I furrowed my brow so that he would know that I meant it as an insult—but honestly, is there any way to tell someone they look like they smoke crystal meth and not mean it as an insult? He looked to be in peak physical condition, but that didn’t stop me from pointing at his flat stomach and smirking. “You’ve gotten fat.”

“Kent,” Kate whispered into my ear. “Kent, I think we should get you home.”

“I don’t need to go home. Gray and I are catching up.”

“Trust me, you’re embarrassing yourself. Let’s get you home.”

“Do you know what’s really embarrassing?”

“This. Right now. This is,” she hissed into my ear.

“Watching me get kicked out of my house and not even having the decency to say goodbye. Letting him take me that night and not doing a goddamn thing when I begged for help. That’s embarrassing.”

Kate dragged me away from the bar as Gray stared at me with bulging eyes.

“Bye,” I shouted, not caring that every eye in the bar was on me and my salsa-coated crotch. Breaking free from the grip Kate had on my wrist, I pointed at my waving hand. “Bye! Bye, Gray! That’s what normal people say when their best friend gets kicked out with sixty dollars to their name, you fucking coward.”

---

Enter the Giveaway:

To celebrate the release of We Burn Beautiful, Lance is giving away a Signed Paperback copy and an e-copy of this beautiful debut!

Enter the Rafflecopter giveaway for your chance to win!

A Rafflecopter Giveaway

Direct Link: http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/cc0f2a57800/?

---

About the Author:

Like Kent Fox, I'm a thirty-something gay man with a flair for the dramatic and a passion for gay romance and LGBTQ+ fiction. I write stories focusing on queer joy and families found along the way.

Connect with Lance:
lancelansdale.com
instagram.com/lancetastik

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